A mom writes in asking for advice. Her 14-year-old son is dating a girl who is also 14. Apparently the only thing this girl wants is to get pregnant, even though she’s so young. The girl comes from a broken home and thinks that getting pregnant is the way to “keep” a man. This mom does not want her son with this girl, especially if she’s trying to get pregnant, but doesn’t know how to keep her son away. Any advice for this mom?
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A member of the community asks:
“I need any help I can get. My son is 14-years-old and keeps falling into a little girl’s trap who is only 14-years-old too. This little girl is so broken and has daddy issues. She seems like she just wants to get pregnant to keep someone, anyone. I know nothing has happened, but as much as I try to keep [my son] away, he keeps going to her house, where her mom is too busy with her daddy issues and multiple men. As soon as he builds trust and I allow him to visit with friends again, he goes back to her. It so frustrating I need help on what will finally work to ride him of her.”
– Mamas Uncut Community Member
Community Advice for This Mom Sick of Her Son’s Girlfriend
To see what advice the Mamas Uncut Facebook community has for this mom in need, read the comments of the post embedded below.
Advice Summary
Advice for this mom was to do the opposite of what she’s currently doing — instead of trying to keep them apart, the OP should try to help this girl AND talk about safe sex … a lot! One commenter said, “She is from a broken family. So bring her into yours. Bond with her, show her love and give her emotionally what she’s lacking at home. Forbidding your son to see her is only going to make him want to see her more. Bring her to your house where you can be in control of the situation and then talk to your son frequently about sex.”
Others agreed that trying to keep the son and this girl apart, even if she does want to get pregnant, is going to backfire. One shared, “If she has ‘daddy issues’ then your husband treating her like a daughter would probably be beneficial to all, right? The two of them are under your nose, she gets to have a positive male role model in her life and she gets to witness a normal functioning family.” Another said, “I think it would be good to have her over to get to know her. You never know — she could be a very sweet girl just in a bad situation and needs to be shown she’s cared about.”
Other commenters advised that it was unlikely this mom would be able to break the couple up, so it was very important to teach her son about safe sex. One commented, “Teach him to use protection. You can’t stop him from seeing this girl, so teach him how important it is to be safe.” Another agreed, “You need to teach your son that condoms are necessary! Buy them for him if you have to. The more you fight it, the more he is going to go to her.”
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