Her mother-in-law (MIL) said what? One mother-in-law did the unthinkable to her daughter-in-law who was dealing with infertility issues. In a recent Reddit post, a woman who has had difficulty getting pregnant described a situation that’s so full of melodrama you might expect to find it in a soap opera rather than real life.
At the woman’s lowest point, after trying tirelessly to get pregnant, she lashed out at her mother-in-law who was not being helpful. This resulted in the MIL delivering some earthshattering news that would not only hurt her feelings but also her marriage: her husband had fathered a secret child.
The absolutely crushing revelation threatened the fabric of her marriage of five years.
The original poster or OP is a 27-year-old woman who’s been with her partner for 7 years and married for 5. She uses the alias “Alan” for her husband throughout the post. Alan is 38-years-old and according to the post the couple, “have tried and tried and tried for a baby, after countless stillbirths and miscarriages we […] had come to terms with the fact that we will not be biological parents.”
What a horrible experience “countless stillbirths and miscarriages” is a devastating way to describe the pain the OP feels.
The OP’s mother-in-law was not aware of what was happening behind the scenes.
“Well, my wonderful MIL is staying with us until everything returns to normal, she wasn’t aware of my fertility status,” the OP explains.
After her MIL engaged in “nagging me to give her a grandbaby” not just once but “countless” times, the OP finally “snapped” and said, “she would not be getting one any time soon.”
This certainly seems like a hard thing for any woman going through infertility issues to endure.
The mother-in-law stewed on the OP’s comments for the day and things finally reached a boiling point at dinner.
“That night at dinner she [brought] it up again and then proceeded to say to my husband ‘Well [her husband’s ex’s name] gave you baby M didn’t she? Maybe she would surrogate for you?'”
The OP used the letter “M” as a stand-in for her husband’s child’s name. Mama -in-law really through a wrench into the works with the statement. The OP was left stunned and speechless.
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It turned out that the OP’s husband had fathered a child who is now 8-years-old.
The OP explained her findings, “Turns out my husband has a little almost 8-year-old child, he doesn’t visit and has no contact with, he has no intention of being in [the child’s] life either.”
Yes, her husband had an 8-YEAR-OLD child that the OP never even knew about. The fact that her husband has no contact with the child might be a red flag. Among many!
Needless to say, the information has caused quite the rift.
“I’ve asked for as much space as possible but I don’t know what to do,” the OP wrote before asking Reddit for advice.
As you might imagine, the story shocked many readers and the post has been upvoted almost 4,000 times. There are many comments on the post and many advised the OP to make some big life changes.
Always rely on Redditors to tell you the hard truths.
“Yikes. Seven years into a relationship and you find out he has an 8-year-old?” a commenter wrote. “That’s a pretty gnarly secret for him to hold onto.”
“Advice? Leave him, now,” another commenter advised. “How can you stay with someone who lied to you for years, and apparently abandoned his child?”
One person even praised the woman’s MIL, “Man, your MIL did you a favor! I’d really like to know more why he’s not in the child’s life. Like what else is he hiding? That’s a massive red flag.”
We certainly hope that something can be worked out between the OP and her husband. Perhaps couples therapy is on the horizon? If not, the family she’s married into doesn’t really seem like the best cast of characters. Perhaps the advice to move on is sound.
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